Aug 7, 2014

Summer of ... discontent?

Content: that's my cat. She's cool.

You may be wondering what has happened to the voracious reader that once was me. I wonder sometimes too. Growing up I read constantly, from about third grade and onwards till about the time I was forced into child labor at age fifteen I read a lot. Enjoyed it. Then life happened and I did read, but just not as much. Then I got back into reading when I had settled down. Then it hit the fan and I stopped reading. Then it slowed down and I picked up with reading again. You get the drift.

I can honestly say (as opposed to the teen years of discovering Christopher Pike, V.C. Andrews and Francine Pascal) that the previous four years I had read more than ever before. And I don't want to say blogger burn-out, because it's not really that.. but things have just evolved in my life where I don't have a ton of spare time to BOTH read and THEN review it.

The reviewing is a chore. A dead bore. A blah blah blah blah there I did it let's move on kind of thing.
Where's the fun in that? Especially since I have given myself a ____________ about having a writer's block. See, I can't remember the freaking word I'm looking for. When I try too hard, I fail. And reviewing has come to be a big failure.

But that's not why I'm really scarce these days.

Blame it on my kids who are growing up, and the fact I have been coerced into volunteering more of that free time I would otherwise be reading with. So this August brings me into two new realms: Sunday School teacher and Girl Scout Assistant Leader. But let's not forget my uber official role of Cub Scout mom.

Damn kids.

I say that in jest. I've been merely floating along this last year wondering WTF is my life all about, and hey, maybe this will bring me the rainbows and sunshine that I've been looking for. Not likely, but at least it will be a semi-diversion from the otherwise train wreck of this lady getting old fast.

I shall be around, and maybe I'll blog more about my life - but I would get in trouble if my husband found out so I probably won't do it that often.

I have also been starving myself. Just wanted to throw that in there. Lost about 10 pounds since July 6. Pretty much eating like a bird and wanting to eat like a pig. But it'll be worth it in the end which I am not exactly sure what that was for any longer. Turns out he still doesn't give a shit about me. So whatever.

I will focus on the things where I can make a difference. Back in the beginning of my blogging days, there were a scattering few of bloggers. I was a newbie on the scene of the seasoned bloggers. And my reviews/posts were commented on, and garnered friendships = I was making a difference, in my little life, by building relationships.

Now that lots of folks blog, and review, and talk books, there really isn't much more that I can give that my next door neighbor couldn't give as well .. so I'll focus a bit more on the reality of me and my kids and try to be there physically for them. Healthy and fit, a good role model, and not with the computer screen in front of my face. Maybe that will be a noble endeavor that will fail anyway as they focus their eyes on small iPhones and iPads, but it's worth a shot.


5 comments:

  1. I hear you, Marie. I thought when my kids got older and more self-sufficient that I'd have more time for the things I enjoyed. I didn't. They actually needed me more, whether they realized it or not! :) Seeing them all grown up now I'm very glad I sacrificed "my" time in favor of my relationships with them. I'm sure you will be, too!

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  2. Ugh, Marie, sounds like a crazy, complicated, stressful summer. My wife and I are talking abt wanting to model less time online, too, when the baby comes, so good luck to you in that endeavor -- I'm already blogging less, mostly out of exhaustion, but it might continue to be intentional. Hope you get to do something fun for yourself this summer or early fall -- or at least, sink into a good book without worrying about reviewing it.

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  3. I'm sorry to hear you're struggling at the moment, Marie. Thinking of you and hoping you get time to yourself to read as well as time to continue being an awesome mom to your kids.

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  4. Marie! I hear you and am in agreement; which you could probably tell since I disappeared from the bloggosphere about a year ago. other things become more important, and seriously, do I need to write an acceptable review for every book I read? Heck no!

    I started doing more on Good reads, when i remember, and decided to change my blog entirely. I've also been doing a lot of life analysis lately, and have come to several decisions. First of whihc is blogging for enjoyment, when and what I feel like.

    Not just books anymore but my life journey, with books on the side. So I'm with you Marie and I'm pretty sure we are not alone in our thinking :)

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    1. I was just wondering how you have been doing! I will also be more visible on goodreads & FB, but definitely not concerned about the blog aspect any longer. I will be spending lots more time volunteering & I don't like the pressure of a book review hanging over my head. Real life is more important, & since my goals have shifted away from writing more towards service, I can't do everything! Things change, people change- & my internet is sporadic & that sucks when you are trying to blog ;) Keep in touch!

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